What was your best gift ever? Was it the one that you longed for and someone figured it out and gave it to you? Was it the one you never would have thought of, but when you got it you realized it was exactly what you needed? Was it the one that you gave to someone else and saw their joy? 2020 has probably been the most challenging year of my life, but it has been all of these gifts as well.
This has been a year of quiet. No visitors graced our home. Without cruise travel, our business did not operate. I was struck by the irony of finally having some free time and being unable to visit with our family or take a vacation because of the pandemic. The Gift of the Magi in its essence. This time was a gift we had longed for, yet our expected plans for it were no longer possible. We do however, live in a vacation paradise. This summer we were actually able to take extended summer adventures in our own backyard. We explored mountain trails on foot and by four wheeler. We visited the historic village of Denali still 70 miles from the nearest paved road, but home to current and historic gold mining operations. It is fascinating to travel for hours through wilderness and suddenly see large equipment. We went camping and looked for moose. We explored lakes by canoe.
We have used a great deal of this time to find more work for ourselves. Mike has done a tremendous job trying to finish our house. When he moved the cabin we left the lowest level unfinished. Mike has worked countless hours finishing it with structural and artistic components.
Without the unexpected shut down of our business, we may never have been able to finish our home. Without the lack of work, we never would have had the time to make those memories together.
It has been quiet around the kennel as well. No apprentices worked for us to learn the art of dog mushing. I saw footage this spring, during the lockdowns, of animals returning to urban areas. We have always lived on the cusp of the wilderness, but even here it seems to have moved closer. I do not know if it is a decrease in activity or a change in my habits allowing me to observe evidence I have not seen before. A lynx leaving tracks right next to the dogs and right along side our house. An owl who calls to me on a regular basis, as I work in the kennel in the dark hours of early morning. The young ermine who lives under my woodstack. The voles who leave snow tunnels and the squirrels who speak to me from the trees.
I have really enjoyed my private time with the dogs. The many accomplishments we have had with our team would not have been possible without help, and I think fondly back to apprentices who have worked here and their lasting impact on me. But secretly I like not having to share my time with the dogs. I love the dogs' individual personalities. E-Street has my number. He has figured out that by rubbing his head against my leg, as if he were petting me, he can convince me to stop and pat back even when I am late. Ramrod is my crush. Even though I ask him not to jump up on me, he leaps in the air lapping at my face with his big goofy tongue like an eager boyfriend trying to steal a kiss. Trixie shines in the kennel. Smart as a whip her attention is remarkable.
While we may not have had any outside help with the dogs, I have had more help from Max than I could have hoped for. He raised a litter of puppies from the day they were born. Feeding them, cleaning up after them, playing with them and teaching them. He was responsible for watering all the adult dogs and helping me remove the poop. He pays attention to how the dogs are acting and notices things many experienced handlers miss. Most of all he has a pattern for giving each dog the love and affection they deserve at the end of the day. He adds their names to songs showing the order he distributes hugs, and tells me of his schedule for which dog gets extra time on which day of the week.
This year I have been teaching remotely. It has been the hardest teaching year of my life. Preparing lessons and materials digitally and struggling to keep kids engaged in our work and experiencing rigorous academics has taken hours off of my sleep and tested my patience. Yet there have been unexpected benefits. I have had the opportunity to work with students from other communities and to broaden my local students’ classroom experience by bringing in these outside voices. I have had the chance to teach courses like Alaska History, which have enthralled me with the content. Because so many schools are remote, I have been able to collaborate with teachers and presenters outside of my school.
Likewise Max has been learning at home. While this has separated him from some of his lifelong friends, he too is experiencing opportunities I could not have provided without 2020. He has the chance to experience a different teacher and to make new friends.. More than anything, it has allowed him to go to school with Mike, who says this is his second time in second grade. For me this has required giving up control. School is my forte, not Mike’s. Yet I have seen him perform better as Max’s wingman in class than experienced paraprofessionals. He pushes and supports Max to be his best. Before we moved to Alaska, Mike spent years working for his father’s business. I remember Mike telling me how lucky he thought he was to have been able to spend all of that time with his dad. This year has brought that experience back around giving him the lucky experience of being able to spend so much time with his son. And Max and I are better off because of his commitment.
Despite deep rifts in our society, 2020 has united us through simultaneous shared experience in a way more powerful than anything else that I have experienced. For years, my life struggles have differed from many. This year, the national news tells my story every day. The struggles of working and helping a child learn from home. The loss of business and uncertainty about the future. The sorrow due to our inability to visit family. While I still may have challenges with freezing temperatures and extremes in daylight that differ from other latitudes, we see that at our core we are more the same than we are different.
Year’s end provides us with a chance to pause. To take the time look about at the past. This year has presented different challenges and different opportunities than I would have expected a year ago. As I went through my photo collection to compile a Christmas book for my parents, I saw that while the days have been hard, the year was good. At the end it is not what we do not have, but what we do. As in the famous O Henry story, we have seen that what shines through the irony and struggle of all our years is love. Love within our families, tested and strengthened through our amplified time together. Love within humanity in our care for one another through our shared experience. And love bigger than ourselves in our chance to wake another day in this beautiful world which continually teaches that you are stronger than you think.
I have complied the photos of our year into a slideshow for you to enjoy. Click the picture below.
Wishing you and your family the very best. Until next time, I hope you are all having as much fun with your family and your dogs as we are with ours.
